Story of Life

Look back into what left behind

2011-03-08T09:27:00.000-08:00

It is long time from the last time I wrote something into my blog. I had been invited by Mateusz Waga (http://www.mateuszwaga.com) to participate in Nairobi Aikikai Blog. That's the reason I look back into my own blog. Nothing much I want so say about anything for time being. Just read through back my blog bring back the memory. Flashing back into my mind and my neuron. Like the dopamine fill up my brain. Feel good and feel pain in the same time. Don't know why. Maybe I just mumbling bubbling about nothing.
Anyway, don't worry my friend. I am good. I just need proper meal for my dinner. Around of pizza will do.

Thank for invite me to write into Nairobi Aikikai Blog. I won't do my best. I just do.

Superman!

2010-09-26T22:39:00.000-07:00

See Superman here!

It is not right

2010-09-26T19:42:00.000-07:00

It is not right
When you are running around in my head
Left the footprint all over my cell
And make me suffer with this cancer

It is not right
If what I can think of is you
And I start forgeting other else
Because invasion is happening in my brain

It is not right
When my cure is to scream your name
And cry out for your hands
Or else I while die suffering

It is not right
Because I am in the left side
Left behind in the dark side
The dark side of my life

It is so right
When I am in your arm
Feel cozy on your skin
Make me fly high to the sky

Pasar

2010-09-26T19:36:00.000-07:00

Aku mau ke pasar
Tempat kebutuhan dasar
Manusia saling bertukar
Untuk hal kecil dan yang besar

Aku suka ke pasar
Ada tomat, sayuran, ikan, bahkan telor dadar
Kutemukan selalu menu baru setiap ke pasar
Membuat cacing-cacing di perutku menggelepar

Aku suka di pasar
Saat ku nongkrong di sebuah kedai
Dengan secangkir kopi hitam dan sebatang cigar
Mengamati manusia yang bersliweran

Aku suka pasar
Karena banyak dikunjungi wanita-wanita liar
Menikmati bentuk-bentuk wanita yang mengusik nalar
Yang berbelanja dengan buas dan tanpa gentar

-------------
At Pasar Modern
BSD - Jakarta
-------------

David Carrol's view of next economic crisis

2010-05-26T23:25:00.000-07:00

To my way of thinking, there's still a lot of unrecognized and therefore, undiscounted debt in the market in general and in Europe in particular. Asia's pretty robust but it is rather exposed in being very export led but it's pretty solid so far because there's not that much debt; in fact if China's start spending, we could very well inflate ourselves out of the doldrums.

It's hard to say whether there'll be a double dip or not but the really big falls in the past have shown a rally after the first and then dipped again. Typically though, the second dip is factored in more aggressively and the market copes better with it, if it comes. With securities mate, there's always volatility and that's why I can't really talk about them generally. Big thigs like industries, property and such are relatively easy.

Not sure what more I can say really, it's more a thing for beer and cigarettes rather than 10 minutes composing an email.

PS: Thanks David!

What should I do?

2010-03-12T11:42:00.000-08:00

The sky is so blue
As my heart is too
Cause I am missing you

As here I lonely stand
We know that I understand
But you are running around in my brain

Is it the rhyme?
Is it the line?
It is you in my mind

Missing you
Yes I do
Wanting you
It is too
What should I do?

Pelangi

2010-02-16T13:18:00.001-08:00

Hatiku merah
Ketika aku jengah
Jengah oleh bola mata indah

Hatiku jingga
Ketika aku terpana
Terpana oleh senyum mempesona

Hatiku ungu
Ketika aku termangu
Termangu oleh gemulainya laku

Hatiku Hijau
Ketika aku galau
Galau oleh sinar cahaya silau

Hatiku Biru
Ketika aku rindu
Rindu oleh cinta kasih itu

Hatiku penuh warna
Karena kulihat pelangi disana
Pelangi dimatanya
Archita

I am a man

2010-02-03T06:17:00.001-08:00

I am a man without integrity
Someone said I have no dignity
Should I argue with it?

I am a man with sin
Someone said with demon within
Should I keep living?

I am a man without heart
Someone said no soul inside
Should I die hard?

But I am a man with hope
Hoping and never not
Until my heart's beat stop

Just Another Day

2010-02-03T06:16:00.001-08:00

I am starring to the screen
And listening to its silent
Give the flash to my eyes
Put me into trance

I know I am in the lowest
Sinking into deepest
The black hole with no end
Drag me into another dimension

Is it Family Guy on my tv?
Peter Griffin laugh at me
With his big tummy
Never stop being crazy

I think I admire him
Me just like him
Being unreasonable all the time
Confuse everyone around

Or it is because the chemical
Messing up my biological
Endorphin and Actifed
Good combination to get

I think I should switch on
To tinkle my bored neuron
Sketching you will cure me
Yeah it will fix me

Wanita

2010-01-26T21:28:00.000-08:00

Wanita
Mengapa kau begitu indah
Maha karya yang kuasa
Buatku terpana

Wanita
Mengapa kau begitu lembut
Dengan belaian yang menhanyut
Buat hatiku terpaut

Wanita
Mengapa kau begitu cantik
Jiwa ragamu yang unik
Buatku tak mampu menampik

Wanita
Lakumu menorehkan sejarah
Snyummu penentu kehidupan
Cintamu melukis masa depan

Wanita
Kau berkuasa
Wanita
Ku tak berdaya

PS: Untuk para wanita
(Supermall Karawaci, 16 January 2010)

Andai Ku Bisa

2010-01-26T21:27:00.000-08:00

Andai ku bisa
Melangkah maju
Tanpa kamu

Andai ku bisa
Menghapus rasa
Tanpa cinta

Ku tak bisa
Ku tak bisa

Andai ku mau
Merangkai waktu
Masa baru

Andai ku mampu
Meninggalkanmu
Masa lalu

Ku tak mampu
Ku tak mampu

Tapi semua ini
Takkan mungkin lagi
Untuk kembali
Jadi satu hati
Ketika kenangan
Menjadi setumpuk angan
Dan tertiup angin menuju kehampaan

Ku tak bisa
Ku tak bisa
Ku tak mampu
Ku tak mampu
Ku tak bisa
Ku tak mampu

PS:
C-CM Am7
Dm7 Am

F Fm
C
F Fm
C
F Fm
C Am
Dm G C

Berhitung

2009-12-10T13:33:00.000-08:00

Aku satu
Tanpa kamu
Bersamaku

Aku dua
Ketika cinta
Hilang sirna

Aku tiga
Saat ceria
Menjadi duka

Ketika hari-hari
Adalah hitungan jari
Dan kutahu tak ada yang pasti
Disetiap langkah kehidupan ini

Suka dan duka silih berganti
Tapi satu yang selalu kunanti
Secercah sinar mentari
Dipagi nanti

PS: Buat Ibu guru

Bidadari Pergi

2009-12-06T11:32:00.000-08:00

Aku duduk diam di sudut ruang
Dengan mata sayu menerawang
Memandang cakrawala berkabut
Seperti hatiku yang kalut

Pelangi yang terbit di langit
Dengan warnanya yang cantik
Seakan berusaha menghiburku
Menghibur hatiku yang biru

Tapi aku tak bisa
Tak bisa lupa tatapan mata
Yang menghantuiku di setiap mimpiku
Yang buatku terjaga di setiap malamku

Mengapa engkau pergi
Dipuncak bahagia cinta
Tatap matamu berkata "ku tak kembali"
Menggurat rasa perih terdalam di dada

Aku masih duduk diam disudut ruang
Dengan mata sayu menerawang
Memandang cakrawala abu
Berharap bidadari turun kebumiku

PS: Buat bidadari
(Thanks to Joko Tarub)

Like Always

2009-12-06T10:43:00.001-08:00

She is gone like always
And I am talking to my self now
The echo of my voice is coming back to me
As it remind me that I am alone
Just by my self
No one will respond me back
No one will miss me back
No one will love me back
But
I miss you
I want you
I love you
Like always

Enough

2009-12-02T06:22:00.001-08:00

Enough is enough

No more love

No more lust

No more pain

Enough is enough

Must hang on

Must be strong

Must go on

When my lips says enough

My heart betray me

But in time

I must realize

And wake up

Coz enough is enough..

Apakah Arti Puisi

2009-12-01T02:32:00.001-08:00

Apakah arti puisi?

Serangkainan kata

Penuh irama

Penghibur indera

Apakah arti puisi?

Ungakapan jiwa

Terkadang rasa benci

Atau bahkan suka

Apakah arti puisi?

Kata bersaut kata

Rasa mengungkap rasa

Tuk ungkapkan gairah jiwa

Apakah arti puisi?

Ketika jiwa yang terluka

Berteriak dalam sepi

Memanggil belahan jiwa

Apakah arti puisi?

Ku tak tahu lagi

Apakah kau peduli

Ketika semua tak berarti lagi

Puisi adalah aku

Puisi adalah kamu

Puisi adalah kita

Puisi adalah cinta

Anin

2009-11-29T08:34:00.001-08:00

Anin memandang
Dengan mata penuh bintang
Yang berkerjap-kerjap indah
Menghilangkan semua gundah

Anin tersenyum
Dengan bibir mungil merekah
Seperti bunga nan harum
Diantara bantal merah

Anin berkata
Dengan kata yang tak terlupa
Tersampai dengan mesra
"Anin sayang Mama"

Anin tataplah aku
Anin sentuhlah aku
Anin peluklah aku
Anin ciumlah aku

Cerialah dalam lindungku
Bertumbuhlah dalam asuhku
Menarilah dalam cintaku
Anin, mama sayang sekali kamu

PS: For Sheila Anindya Aji

Kangen

2009-11-27T13:28:00.000-08:00

Aku terbaring kaku
Kegelapan memelukku
Mencoba memejamkan mata
Tapi ku tak bisa

Mata itu
Muncul selalu
Setiap aku terpejam
Bayangmu memandangku tajam

Tempatku terbaring
Terasa dingin
Membuatku beku
Menghentikan darahku

Menatap langit-langit
Mengingat setiap detik
Setiap detik bersamamu
Tertanam dalam dibenakku

Aku ingin kulitmu
Aku ingin bibirmu
Aku ingin sentuhmu
Aku ingin kamu

To love you

2009-11-24T12:19:00.001-08:00

It broke my heart
Knowing you are hurt
And I am not there
To comfort you

It broke my bone
Knowing you are sad
And I am not there
To ease your pain

It choke my throat
Knowing you cry
And I am not there
To wipe your tears

It is killing me
Knowing you are there
And I am not with you
To love you

Kau

2009-11-24T11:25:00.000-08:00

Ketika kita satu
Kurasa detak jantungmu
Darah kita mengalir menyatu
Bahagia selalu bersamamu

Ketika kau di dalamku
Ku rasa kau selalu
Dengan penantian penuh
Melewati malam dengan peluh

Ketika aku adalah kamu
Senandungku mengusikmu
Dan geliatmu kunanti selalu
Tuk bawa cakrawala yang baru

Menatapku adalah merasamu
Mengusapku adalah menyentuhmu
Menciumku adalah membangkitkanmu
Memelukku adalah mengasihimu

Saat ini kita tak menyatu
Tapi kita tetap satu
Darahmu adalah darahku
Hatiku hanya untukmu

Aku kan selalu memelukmu
Aku kan selalu melindungmu
Aku kan selalu mencintamu
Kau anakku

PS: Untuk semua ibu

Detak Denyut

2009-11-19T09:43:00.000-08:00

Ketika dia berdetak
Darah di nadi pun menyentak
Menghantarkan gelombang kehidupan
Untukku melangkah kedepan

Ketika dia berdenyut
Hangat di dada pun bergayut
Mencipta hati penuh cinta
Untukku hidup bersamanya

Ketika dia berhenti diam
Nafaspun hilang terpendam
Tatapan mata menghitam kelam
Akupun jatuh ke lubang terdalam

Aku tanpa rasa
Aku tanpa cinta
Aku tanpa jiwa
Aku tanpa nyawa

Dengan mata terbuka
Tergeletak di pinggir selokan
Memandang hampa
Kosong
Hilang
...
..
.

Dan
Aku berdiri disini
Memandang tubuhku terbaring
Sendiri
Mati

PS: For my heart

When I am with you

2009-11-17T13:52:00.000-08:00

When I miss you
When I want you close to be with me
To share our feeling
To talk about small thing
And spent our time with smiling

When I am lonely
When I think a moment with you
Only you and me
Laughing and joking
To talk about a small thing

But it just memory
Which I can not forget
I don't have anything
To make it coming back
I hope there is chance
To see you once again
So I can convince you
That we should be together

When I am with you
When I hug you to close to my heart beat
Only the eyes speak
I gently touch your lips
Forever I want you with me

I want you with me
I want you with me

Dia

2009-11-07T21:46:00.000-08:00

Matanya indah menggoda
Bulu matanya lentik menarik
Memandang dengan penuh arti
Dia cantik

Senyumnya manis menawan
Tawanya tergerai penuh kehidupan
Bibirnya lincah bercerita
Dia indah

Langkahnya ceria tanpa ragu
Gerak tubuhnya penuh harap
Dengan lambaian gemulainya
Dia mempesona

Aku menggandeng tangannya
Menuntun dia dalam lindunganku
Menjaga dan mencintainya
Dia putriku

Seribu Satu Masa

2009-11-07T21:41:00.000-08:00

seribu satu masa
hanya satu yang kurasa
rasa hampa tiada terkira

seribu satu masa
aku tenggelam disana
ditelan lautan derita

seribu satu masa
aku mencoba berjalan
meraih indahnya masa depan

seribu satu masa
aku tahu aku bisa
melewati semua rasa

aku lelaki
terbuat dari besi
tak punya hati

Note: Untuk hati besiku yang hilang

The Corridor

2009-11-04T13:41:00.000-08:00

It is like walking in corridor
Yes, dark and long corridor
The corridor which I never know where it will end
And when I will reach the end

My blurry eyes see silhouette of you in the end of corridor
With bright light as its background
As my guidance
To lead me through this long dark corridor

But as I step forward in this corridor
The light in the end of corridor is fading away
The darkness is growing
And it is taking away image of you from my sight

I am still crawling forward in this corridor
With lamp of love in my hand to light my step
For it to lead me to the end of corridor
To you

Di atas bukit itu

2009-10-28T12:27:00.000-07:00

Di atas bukit itu
Sinar matahari sore mengusap wajahmu
Angin memainkan gemulai berkas rambutmu
Rerumputan membelai halus tubuhmu
Aroma bunga liar menghiasi wangimu

Tetesan cinta mengalir di dada
Darahpun mendidih oleh bara asmara
Dan panca indra terpusat pada satu rasa
Tak ada jalan untuk kembali

Matamu indah menatap langit
Menghitung formasi awan di sana
Satu...dua...tiga...empat...lima...
Enam....tujuh...delapan....sembilan....sepuluh....
Langitpun terbuka
Turun ke bumi
Surga

For: Aislinn Andrews

I miss you

2009-10-28T04:17:00.000-07:00

The night is so quite
Only me and the empty space
And the numb is in my heart
Since you are not here

It is my only guitar
Which make me feel warm
And my finger run through it
As my mind through you

As the night move to dawn
I still can't close my eyes
Cause the empty feeling
Stay here in my lung

I miss you
So much I miss you
I need you by my side
For me to love you
Now and forever

Aku berdiri diam

2009-10-28T04:11:00.000-07:00

Aku berdiri diam
Memandang cakrawala
Yang entah mengapa
Seakan mendekat ke dada

Aku berdiri diam
Menarik nafas panjang
Yang entah mengapa
Terasa berat di dada

Aku berdiri diam
Dengan mata berkaca
Yang entah mengapa
Rasa tertusuk di dada

Aku berdiri diam
Menggapai angan disana
Mencoba meraih asa
Tapi harap sudah tak ada

Disini aku terbaring
Sendiri
Sepi
Mati

PS: Untuk semua jiwa yang sepi

A Nice Linux ScreenSaver

2009-05-11T00:04:00.000-07:00

Not try yet.

#!/bin/sh

file=phosphor-kernel-src.pl # script to create

linux_src_dir=/usr/src/linux # location of kernel src

cat <<> "$file"

#!/usr/bin/perl

srand;

rand(\$.) < line =" \$_)">;

print \$line;

__DATA__

EOF

find -L "$linux_src_dir" -name \*.c >> $file

chmod 555 $file

Maurice Gitau says "$ sold to the dogs...!"

2009-05-10T23:03:00.000-07:00

Well the US NFP results were better than expected - 539K jobs lost in April against estimated 600K. Also unemployment rate came in at 8.9% as estimated. Though poor results, but it shows a slow down in job losses meaning the financial crisis is slowing down and may turn neutral by year end. As I had stated below stock markets have rallied on this news – Dow, Nasdaq and S&P 500 all up. Oil is also marginally up as it’s overbought since yesterday and a pullback has to happen fast before it can trade higher. Other commodities are also up and at these levels a pull back on all markets (equities and commodities) is required before another big rally happens. Traditionally May is a selling month in the

, but with the current conditions, I doubt this will happen. As usual, with equities and commodities rallying, the $ does take a hard beating. All major currencies especially Asian and other commodity based like Canadian $ have gained big figures against the $. This is why I was stated yesterday, I’d prefer selling the commodity currencies at these high levels, but a big risk was also in the offing if the $ weakened. So I will have to wait till next week to time the sell entry during the pull back. And the $ beating has been bad and nasty with the $ oversold beyond lows last since on Dec 19 2008, Jan 5 2009 and Mar 19 2009! After markets close today, the charts will indicate the $ is bearish (a sell signal) and it will be sold off even next week whenever it tries a recovery rally. As it stands, in the short term, we are back to expensive Euro, Pound, and Yen (really bad for importers – especially electronics, cars etc and Asian exporters since goods become expensive to sellL). I expect the Ksh to rally against the $ next week as the sell off continues. Your country’s currency should also reflect the same and your stocks should be greener J

Maurice Gitau says

2009-05-08T04:37:00.000-07:00

Well the bank stress results were positive so that removes a major worry from the market. However, US markets closed lower due to the risk event of negative stress results released after market close. Asia markets opened mixed on digesting the impact of the results and regained the losses to close positive for the week. However, the gains were minimal considering that US non-farm payroll (NFP) results are released today at 12:30GMT (15:30 here). The NFP indicator tracks the job loss factor and is a major economy trend indicator. If the results show more job losses than estimated (600K lost jobs + unemployment rate greater than 8.9%) then the US $ will gain ground against major currencies as stocks would be sold off with real money going to treasuries (T-Bills and Bonds) to cover from negative exposure to the economic slump risk. This will also hit the Oil price currently at $58 and commodities would fall.

If the results are better than expected, the reverse happens. This would see oil heading to $60 as commodities and equity stocks rally on improved US econ statistics while the US $ would be sold off against major currencies. Exactly 1hr to go before the big announcement…

Economic Analysys by Maurice Gitau

2009-05-07T23:49:00.001-07:00

This analysis is done by Maurice Gitau. I impress with the detail so I decided to put it here. Enjoy.

"On a money note – stock markets have rallied hard today since most economists expect the US bank stress test result to be released today will be positive showing the US 19 largest banks are not in danger of collapse should the econ worsen. Nikkei close 4% up plus a number of Asian markets, Europe markets picked up from where Asia left and have been up most of the day. However, the open in the

markets has steamed down due to increase jobless claims for Q1, analysts had estimated a reduction. Also some tech companies reporting Q1 results today posted losses with SiriusXM (Satellite Radio Company) stocks hitting 10% down! Also microchips firms are down. So Nasdaq and Dow jones losses are currenly stalling the rally up. However, oil is heading up towards $60/barrel…! I think at this level it is totally overbought and a correction back to $50 is on the cards. When oil reverses, most global commodity stocks also follow its trend. So in forex, selling Aussie $,

New Zealand

$ and Euro against the

$ has the possibility of making some good cash. If the

closes down, then I expect Asia to sell off tomorrow too. And I’m hoping that the bank stress results are positive. Otherwise the selloff will be big on

financial stocks (S&P 500) which automatically will have a knock on effect to the other global markets."

Update Boxee on Apple TV Manually

2009-04-08T05:22:00.000-07:00

Just downloaded latest alpha boxee (boxee-0.9.11.5591.dmg).

To to update manually into my Apple TV:

1. Upload the boxee file into ATV with sftp

2. Get the latest script to update:

wget http://atv-xbmc-launcher.googlecode.com/svn/tags/boxee-info/scripts/alpha-0.9.11.5591_update.sh

3. Run this:

sh alpha-0.9.11.5591_update.sh boxee-0.9.11.5591.dmg

4. Reboot:

sudo reboot

Enjoy!

Oon...

2007-09-03T07:14:00.000-07:00

Emang oon diriku. Setelah sekian lama, baru inget lagi kalo pernah punya blog. Jadi sekarang mau di isi lagi deh blognya. Siapa tau ada yang baca. Paling nggak gue baca sendiri.

2006-06-11T14:08:00.000-07:00

Ini waktu jalan-jalan di Yaya Center, the Sunday Masai market. Lagi liat-liat patung dan ambil beberapa sample foto untuk di kirim ke David Hofman, temen yang di Kuwait.

Chita jadi model sebagai perbandingan untuk nujukin seberapa besar patungnya. Malu-malu gitu Chita gayanya. Hehehe... Lucu juga.

2006-06-11T14:01:00.000-07:00

Ini baliho di sudut jalan Nairobi, Kenya. Mengangkat issu mengenai harga minyak mentah yang naik. Walau pun enggak nyambung antara harga minyak dan cara masak ayam Nando, tapi lumayan juga ini iklan. Enjoy.